Erica Desper is the founder of the Center for Confident Parenting, born in 2011 out of her own challenging entry into parenting and the lack of a village of support to help her navigate it. Many years later, after navigating a new struggle to get diagnoses and school supports for her son, she founded the Confident Parenting Collective, a resource to help local families access information and connect with parent recommended resources and providers with availability. Learn more about Erica's mission here.
Where Can I Have My Child Evaluated for Autism, ADHD & Giftedness?
Erica Desper
Where Can I Have My Child Evaluated for Autism, ADHD & Giftedness?
If you have concerns about your child's development or learning, then you likely already know that many local providers have waitlists as long as 18-24 months for evaluations. As a parent who was once putting my child's name on those lists, I grew frustrated and made it my mission to collect parent recommended resources with minimal waitlists who can help families get answers as early as possible. Here are many excellent options to consider.
Pediatric Psychology Center of Chester County (Exton, Downingtown & Reading)
In practice since 2013, Erin opened the Pediatric Psychology Center of Chester County in early 2020 to continue her work providing both assessment and treatment of children/families managing a number of developmental and behavioral concerns. Her long-term goal was to develop a unique office that provides a solid medical home for families to receive a variety of clinical services under one roof, and indeed the practice grew much more quickly than expected in an attempt to meet the needs of the community throughout the pandemic.
Erin values the opportunity to provide a solid fit in treatment for each incoming client with as short a wait as possible. At PPCCC, they believe that finding a perfect fit between client and clinician is of utmost importance and will work to make sure that you are expertly matched…even if that means they help connect you with another office.
Open Minds Psychological (Plymouth Meeting & Phoenixville)
Dr. Brianna Matey is the founder of Open Minds Psychological and a clinical psychologist. Dr. Matey started Open Minds Psychological in 2018 as a private practice to provide quality therapeutic and diagnostic services to the community. Dr. Matey has 13+ years experience in community mental health most recently as the VP of Clinical Services of Child Guidance Resource Center. Dr. Matey retained clinical and fiscal oversight of 20+ million in service revenue. Dr. Matey received extensive clinical training in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy while at Philadelphia College of Osteopathic Medicine studying to be a Clinical Psychologist. Dr. Matey is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist and Professional Counselor in PA. Dr. Matey practices as a part of the PsyPact interstate compact.
Dr. Matey's extensive training and experience creates a unique skill set and passion for working with individuals to support needs around emotional regulation, anxiety, depression, trauma and coping skill development. Open Minds also offers psychological evaluations to assess developmental, cognitive, academic, and behavioral needs, high-risk assessment as well as career counseling.
Dr. Lana Shapiro (Center City Philadelphia)
Dr. Lana Schapiro is a Developmental and Behavioral Pediatrician with over ten years of clinical and research experience in leading medical centers such as the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia (CHOP), the University of Pennsylvania, Montefiore Medical Center, Cohen Children’s Hospital and with extensive experience in the field. Most recently an Associate Professor of Pediatrics at the Perelman School of Medicine in the University of Pennsylvania, she brings both personal and professional experience in the field to approach each child and family holistically.
Dr. Schapiro specializes in the early diagnosis of autism and managing the developmental and behavioral concerns of medically complex children. She provides comprehensive evaluations and tailored treatment plans for children and adolescents with developmental and behavioral differences.
Philadelphia Integrative Psychiatry (Devon)
At Philadelphia Integrative Psychiatry, their mission is to provide a comprehensive integrative care. Traditionally, mental health providers work individually. This means that providers miss opportunities to communicate and collaborate – and the patient suffers. They do things differently here at Philadelphia Integrative Psychiatry. By providing all their services under one roof, they are bridging a gap in mental health treatment. Their marriage between mental health and physical health helps to identify core sources of distress for their patients, be it psychological, medical, or a combination of both. Their team of mental health professionals and nutritionists have varying backgrounds, education, and emphases. They have someone for everyone.
Their mission is to continue to evaluate this relationship, learn and adapt to the latest research, while constantly improving the care and services delivered to their patients. Philly Integrative offers psychiatric evaluations and Autism assessment.
TLC Wellness (Radnor)
TLC Wellness is a dedicated outpatient therapy service that supports the mental health and well-being of children ages 2-18, their caregivers, and adults. Our team of skilled clinicians offers a wide range of therapeutic services, including individual therapy, as well as couples and family therapy, ensuring that every member of the family receives the care and attention they need. We are committed to providing a safe and supportive environment where clients can work through their challenges and build healthier, more fulfilling lives.
In addition to our therapeutic services, TLC Wellness offers specialized assessments to address developmental concerns. We are experienced in identifying and supporting children with ADHD, utilizing tools such as the Vanderbilt Assessment for children in kindergarten and up. For children under five, we assess for autism using the CARS-II, providing families with the insights and resources they need to support their child's development.
The Center for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (Media)
The Center for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is a group of highly specialized psychologists who work exclusively within their specific areas of expertise. We only do treatments that have been rigorously tested in clinical trials. This specialized approach ensures that each patient is getting the most effective treatment. Within the realm of evaluations, they offer comprehensive testing (including neuropsychological testing) for ADHD, Autism, and Learning Disorders.
They also have a specialty clinic for ADHD testing in girls. Traditional ADHD testing is fantastic, but it was designed for boys. And, since ADHD tends to look significantly different in girls than it does in boys, girls undergoing ADHD testing that doesn't specifically and methodically account for those differences risk their ADHD being overlooked and/or mis-diagnosed. They are proud and passionate about offering thoughtful, comprehensive ADHD evaluations that take into account the gender- specific nuances of ADHD so that girls get access to accurate diagnoses and, consequently, appropriate and effective treatments.
Comprehensive Neuropsychology Services (Paoli & Bryn Mawr)
Dr. Baum is the owner of Comprehensive Neuropsychological Services, PLLC, and a board-certified clinical neuropsychologist, which reflects the highest level of competence in the field. She is passionate about working with families to understand their concerns and use evidence-based approaches to evaluate the dynamic relationship between the brain, and an individual’s thoughts, behavior, learning, emotions, culture, and environment. Armed with this information, she works with families and others (teachers, doctors) to identify specific next steps. The goal is greater joy, fulfillment, purpose, satisfaction, and connectedness. Her evaluations offer an in-depth understanding of how your or your loved one’s brain works and what you can do to help. She offers neuropsychological evaluations, ADHD evaluations for children and adults, testing for giftedness, advanced academic programs, or private school admissions, psychoeducational evaluations and testing for learning disabilities & more.
She has specialized training in understanding how neurological, developmental, and medical conditions affect children, teens', and young adults', and their families. Specifically, she is passionate about working with individuals with developmental conditions like autism spectrum disorders, attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, and learning disabilities. Her expertise also helps families understand and support their ‘typically-developing’ child, who may be struggling with emotional control, behavior, learning, or social interactions. She has a strong background working with patients with current or past brain injuries or illness, or with complex medical or developmental histories. Results of her evaluations guide medical, school, home, and community services and supports and can guide decisions around admissions to programs or colleges or accommodations for standardized testing.
Emily Perlis, PsyD (Bryn Mawr)
As a developmental neuropsychologist, Dr. Emily Perlis has training in Clinical Psychology, Neuropsychology, and Developmental Psychology. She uses knowledge of typical brain development to evaluate, diagnose, and help treat children, adolescents, and young adults with a variety of conditions impacting development and learning.
The evaluations include a review of medical and educational records, clinical interview, observation of behavior, behavior rating scales, and a battery of standardized tests. These tests assess intellectual functioning, attention, learning and memory, language, visual-spatial skills, sensory and motor functioning, executive functions (working memory, organization, problem solving, inferential reasoning), academic abilities, emotional and behavioral functioning, adaptive functioning, and social skills.
The Neurobehavioral Wellness Center (South Jersey)
The Neurobehavioral Wellness Center (NWC) provides psychological and neuropsychological services to individuals across the lifespan. They specialize in the diagnosis and treatment of children and adolescents with an array of presenting issues, including Autism, ADHD, learning disabilities, executive functioning difficulties, etc. Located in South Jersey, close to all major bridges, they are conveniently accessible to the tri-state area. They are a practice of doctoral level psychologists and neuropsychologists from a variety of backgrounds and expertise providing testing, diagnostics, and recommendations for the treatment of numerous neuropsychological and psychological disorders.
The NWC has providers trained in the area of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) diagnosis of children and adolescents starting around 3 years of age. They diagnose ASD and help to develop treatment plans and provide referrals based on the children's specific need, which differs across all children.
If you need resources in other areas such as therapy, parent coaching and more be sure to visit our growing directory of parent recommended providers!
Thank you to Dr. David Danish, President and Psychiatrist at Philadelphia Integrative Psychiatry and Chris Smith, Board Certified Behavior Analyst and Licensed Behavior Specialist for answering this parent question.
Join me in welcoming ABA Centers of Pennsylvania to Bala Cynwyd and Wayne/King of Prussia. They are smashing lengthy local waitlists for autism diagnosis and care, getting children 2-17 years in within 47 days of their initial contact and they work with most major insurances.
Beyond Autism Opens their 3rd Location in Havertown Pa! Beyond Autism is a collaborative center that provides individualized ABA, Speech and Occupational Therapy for children and adolescents diagnosed on the Autism Spectrum. They partner with families living with autism to build a strong foundation for their children in early childhood and beyond and passionately believe that their team inspires and supports change through evidence-based teaching methods and practices. Their newest location recently opened in Havertown and they continue to offer services out of their West Chester and Media locations. Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) is a scientific, data based field that has utilized principles of learning and behavior for over 30 years to teach children with Autism enhanced social behaviors like self-care, play, motor skills, language, academic, self-help and other living skills. Their typical timeframe to begin services ranges from 2-4 weeks and, best of all, Beyond accepts all major commercial insurances. While they are not a Medicaid provider, they do offer a hardship program for those in need of financial assistance. Beyond offers a variety of service areas which include but are not limited to: Autism Spectrum Disorder Childhood Apraxia of Speech Early Intervention of Speech/Language Delay Expressive and Receptive Language Disorders Fluency/Stuttering Disorders Artic Phonological Disorders Social Skills/Pragmatic Language Deficits Learning Disabilities Augmentative and Alternative Communication (AAC) Feeding and swallowing Their occupational therapy program focuses on providing skilled based services in the following areas: Activities of daily living (i.e dressing, feeding, toileting & tooth brushing) Sensory processing Fine and gross motor skills Self-regulation and social skills Visual motor & perception skills Play and leisure skills Learn more and contact them at the link below and welcome Beyond Autism to the neighborhood!
Do you have a child who is exploring potential careers and wishes to do more research? Here are my top 3 websites to explore job goals! O*Net Online O*Net Online is a fabulous website that you could spend hours on. Do you have a specific job that you are interested in researching? You can search for it specifically and you can see all of the job duties associated, the education required, salary information, as well as other jobs that are related to that position. You can also explore jobs based on a specific skill set, by professional associations, job duties, etc. The website also designates which jobs are “bright outcomes”, meaning that the industry is growing and therefore jobs will most likely be available in your field. The website also includes a free interest profile which is helpful in narrowing options. Overall, I could spend hours doing research on O*Net! It is my favorite website by far! Pennsylvania’s Center for Workforce Information & Analysis This website provides labor statistics based on information gathered from the state of Pennsylvania and breaks it down by counties. My favorite statistic to explore is the “Top 50 New Hires”. This is updated every quarter, so it has the most up to date information. This list shows the top 50 employers in each county who have hired workers. This list can be beneficial to explore what type of industries are prevalent in the area that you live in or wish to live in, as well to give ideas of employers to explore for potential jobs. You can find an employer and then search their site for the types of jobs that they are hiring for. The information is extremely interesting, especially when comparing different counties. Occupational Outlook Handbook This website is similar to O*Net Online because it also allows you to explore different job goals in a variety of ways including by pay, educational level, projected new jobs, and projected growth rate. This website is developed using the US Bureau of Labor Statistics. There is a video on the home page which gives you information on how to best use the site. It is another great option for you and your child to explore different job goals. The Pennsylvania Office of Vocational Rehabilitation, or OVR, provides vocational rehabilitation services to help persons with disabilities prepare for, obtain or maintain employment.
If you are a parent of a child with an intellectual disability or autism, it can be overwhelming knowing which agencies you need to connect with to support your child. One of the first agencies that you should explore is the Office of Developmental Programs (ODP). Pennsylvania’s Office of Developmental Programs has a mission to assist Pennsylvanians with developmental disabilities to achieve greater independence, choice, and opportunity in their lives. Services include (but are not limited to) assistive technology, benefits counseling, community support, therapies, transportation, employment support, educational support, respite care, housing, etc. The services provided are tailored to the needs of your child. You must contact your county ODP office and schedule a time to speak with the intake person who will gather your information. ODP provides services through Administrative Entities. An administrative entity is an agency that can oversee ODP services. As a parent, you will have a choice of which Administrative Entity you would like to work with. It is encouraged to reach out to speak to the different Administrative Entities available to determine which one is the best fit for your family. I also encourage you to discuss with other members of your community who may have worked with them in the past. Once assigned to an administrative entity, you will be assigned to a Supports Coordinator who will be your main point person as you navigate services. It is important that this person is kept in the loop and informed of any important changes. Services are funded through something called a “waiver”. Some waivers are available at birth, therefore there is no need to wait to enroll for ODP. There are different waivers available and although several of them overlap in the types of services they provide, they may differ in the amount of funds that can be spent on a yearly basis. This can impact the number of services your child can access and at times, you may have to prioritize what is most important for them to have. Your supports coordinator will let you know which waiver you are eligible for and will help develop a plan, an Individualized Service Plan, which will outline the services provided. The ISP is updated on an annual basis. I have had discussions with families in the past who have been hesitant to enroll with ODP because they had misconceptions of the services that they provide. They believed that the services were just for individuals with significant cognitive disabilities and that their child would not be eligible. Some families I have worked with didn’t realize that individuals with autism were eligible for ODP as well. In reality, ODP provides funding for an extensive amount of services. If your child is going to need supported employment services, ODP will work hand in hand with the Office of Vocational Rehabilitation to provide the on-going on-site support. ODP funds have also been used to pay for the tuition for autism programs through universities. I have also seen ODP funds be used to fund Uber rides to and from employment. Your supports coordinator will be the one to assist you in determining how funds are used. Why is it important to enroll now versus waiting? For some waivers, it may be first come first served and may require for you to join a wait list. The number so individuals accessing these services continues to grow and there are limits to the funding available. In addition, it is important to have the supports coordinator involved early so that they can assist with the transition out of high school. In addition, to be eligible, you must provide documentation and complete an application. This process can take time, so you do not want to wait to get started. For more information about ODP, please visit ODP’s website which features The Gold Book , which explains services and waivers in digestible way.
Whether your teen or young adult is moving toward post secondary education or employment, Certified Vocational Rehabilitation Counselor Erin Brown has tips for a smoother transition... In PA, planning for the transition from high school to employment and/or post-secondary education begins at age 14, however, it's never too late to start! Here are things to keep in mind when planning and implementing a transition plan. Talk About Employment Early Students are typically only exposed to jobs they interact with so you'll want to widen their exposure as well as discuss their interests and hobbies and how those might intersect with potential employment opportunities. Learn what positions are available within a field of interest and what educational levels are required for those fields and positions. In order to obtain services from the Office of Vocational Rehabilitation , the student must have one specific job goal that they are working towards in order to determine what services they will receive. Know Agency Timelines There are many programs and agencies to support your student at any age but they have varying, and often inflexible, timelines. Learning what is available to and creating a timeline for when to start the process with each agency will help you avoid missing needed support. Practice Advocacy Now A crucial skill for your student to develop for both employment and postsecondary education is the ability to speak about their disability and support needs. Involving them in IEP meetings can afford them practice and confidence in this area which they can utilize down the road in speaking with professors, employers and more. Practice Soft Skills Soft skills are the skills your student will need to be successful with any job or education program. These include hygiene, dressing appropriately, professional communication, comfort in interviews, taking feedback , learning to wake up independently and on time and much more. All the things your teen, especially if they are neurodivergent, likely struggles with! Find Employment Opportunities Employment opportunities allow your student to experience the work setting first-hand and to learn what they do and do not like regarding tasks, setting and and which skill areas need improvement. Often learning what they don't like is even more valuable than learning what they do like. Any type of paid or unpaid work experience will be a valuable experience in determining those things. Who Can Help A transition counselor or consultant can work with you and your student when planning for and embarking on transition services by: * Discussing employment goals * Reviewing current services received by school district/agencies * Reviewing available agencies client should be connected to * Reviewing potential programs/services client may be interested in * Discussing tangible goals and plans, both in the short term and plans for future years dependent on where they are in the transition/employment process * Working with your child to come up with a schedule that will look at not only their upcoming assignments and tests but will also help prioritize what they need to be working on and introduce organizational techniques that they can use independently in future semesters or years
Wondering if your child's behaviors are typical or a sign of something more? Our friends at the Center for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy can help!... Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a neurodevelopmental disorder that is marked by difficulties with social communication/interaction, as well as restricted or repetitive behaviors or interests. Kids with ASD can begin showing signs as early as 12 months of age, but it’s typically recommended that families wait until 18-24 months to get formal testing. By age 2, a diagnosis by an experienced ASD evaluation expert can be considered reliable. Depending on a child’s developmental milestones, the specific symptoms they may be showing, and where they lie on the ASD spectrum, ASD can easily be misdiagnosed or go unnoticed. Due to missed signs and behaviors, it is important for parents and caregivers to understand what some potential signs and symptoms of ASD may be. In younger children, signs of ASD include: *Avoiding eye contact *Disengagement with games or playing with peers *Lack of pretend play *Toileting troubles *Sensory sensitivity (i.e., touch, smell, noise) *Tantrums that occur more often and last longer than peers In older children, signs of ASD include: *Difficulty engaging with the back and forth flow of conversations *Difficulty with perspective-taking (i.e., seeing another’s point of view, understanding how another is feeling) *Tendency to discuss a specific topic for an overly extended period of time *Struggles with interpreting nonverbal language of others such as body movements, facial expressions, nonverbal cues *Repetitive movements or behaviors such as flapping one’s hands (often called stimming) *Rigidity regarding routines If your child is displaying these characteristics, give your pediatrician a call and ask for a screening to determine whether a more extensive ASD evaluation would be indicated. If not, feel free to give us a call (267-551-1984) and we can help you figure out whether you should pursue a full assessment for ASD. One thing to note is that the earlier you get a proper diagnosis and treatment, the better the outcomes for your child will be. Proper Autism testing should be comprehensive and include multiple sources of information (including the Autism Diagnostic Observation Schedule, which is the hallmark component of the gold-standard Autism assessment battery). The Autism evaluation experts at the Center for CBT offer extremely comprehensive, accurate Autism evaluations that include detailed treatment plan recommendations and next steps for your child. You can read more about our ASD evaluations at the Center for CBT here or give us a call for a consultation directly with an Autism evaluation specialist at 267-551-1984.
In recent years, the podcast industry has given rise to hundreds of new shows on almost any topic imaginable. Sometimes, the sheer amount of shows can make it hard to know where to start. For this week’s blog post, we gathered from La Salle University clinical psychology doctoral students what some of their favorite podcasts are on the topics of psychology/mental health, mindfulness, and self care. Here are our favorite mental health podcasts: FEELING GOOD This podcast focuses on how we can change the way we feel, tackle depression and anxiety, and experience more joy in our lives. SAVVY PSYCHOLOGIST Hosted by Dr. Monica Johnson, the Savvy Psychologist works to incorporate research and her professional expertise on the reasons why we experience emotions as well as strengthen our relationships with ourselves and with family and friends. TERRIBLE, THANKS FOR ASKING Nora McInerny emphasizes honesty and normalizing tough conversations about our emotions and mental health through both compassion and humor. Described as a show that “lets real people get real honest about how they’re really doing.” TAKE THE CAKE This podcast covers a range of topics that aim to unpack complex conversations regarding health and wellness, body image, lifestyle, and more. THE HAPPINESS LAB Created by Dr. Laurie Santos of Yale University, this podcast sets out to discuss the ways in which we can control our own happiness. She incorporates scientific research to discuss the relationship between human behavior and our emotions. THE HILARIOUS WORLD OF DEPRESSION This podcast focuses specifically on depression, one of the most common diagnoses in the field of psychology. Episodes focus on minimizing the stigma that surrounds melancholy. This podcast is a helpful resource for anyone looking to better understand and manage their own symptoms of depression. INSIDE MENTAL HEALTH This podcast aims to make mental health accessible to all. Each episodes features either professionals in the field or celebrities. Personal experiences take center stage in this podcast, exploring psychological concepts, terminology, trauma, recovery, and self care in ways that are easy to understand. MENTAL ILLNESS HAPPY HOUR Interviews with notable figures and celebrities about their experience with mental health and trauma experience. THE PSYCHOLOGY OF YOUR 20S A podcast that explains psychology concepts with a focus on your 20’s.
I am writing this 13 years into my parenting journey and 8 years after I first voiced concern about my son to his teacher in 1st grade. Long, agonizing story short, he was passed on year after year as “too young” and “fine” and “not a behavior problem”. The school evaluations we did manage to secure found nothing aside from some executive functioning deficits that “didn’t require specialized education”. Fast forward to 8th grade: he was failing and several independent evaluations determined my son had the following slew of diagnoses: Autism Level 2 ADHD Anxiety Auditory Processing Disorder OCD Dyscalculia (Specific Learning Disability in Math) Dysgraphia (Developmental Coordination Disorder/DCD) Pragmatic Language Deficit Sensory Processing Disorder Social Anxiety Communication Disorder Visual Processing Disorders While I did the best I could with who I was and what I knew at the time, I did it all “wrong”. I struggle with immense guilt, frustration and regrets. I was trusting and quiet. I allowed others to make me second guess myself. I am choosing to channel all of those feelings into my mission to help other parents and children avoid a similar prolonged journey by bringing you the information and resources you need to do it better and from the start. If I had the journey to do all over again, here is a short list of the most critical things I would tell myself at the start… Do Trust Your Gut When my son had to be pried from my body every morning for all of his preschool years, I suspected something was up. Shouldn’t he have adjusted by now? When he couldn’t form his letters correctly, despite loads of practice, when numbers didn’t seem to make sense to him, when he would forget a concept from problem to problem, I knew something was up. I can’t even count the number of friends, family members and professionals who told me I was “just looking for things that were wrong” or “just being a nervous first time mom” or that he was “just giving me a hard time.” My gut knew that he was HAVING a hard time and guess what? I was right, all along. Trust your gut and don’t let anyone make you question it. Don’t Rely On the District to Guide You We took advantage of every teacher conference and always brought our concerns to those meetings. No one ever once said, “You can/should/could request an evaluation.” No one even said “I agree you should look into this.” He was good and quiet and smart and could rely on his strengths to get through each day, falling apart as soon as he walked out the door. When I was told by the team that he only needed a 504 and accommodations, I didn’t question it. I mean, they are the experts, right? It’s their duty by law to adequately assess and support every student, correct? Yes, it is. Unfortunately, it is also in their best interests to follow the letter of the law and not offer, suggest or give more than a parent asks for. Educate yourself about what is available and adequate for your child (or seek out someone who knows) and ask for those things explicitly and adamantly. Do Be the Squeaky Wheel Explicit and adamant are not always enough. Unfortunately, special education resources are like a pie and there are far more children who need pie than there are pieces to dole out. If you are concerned about being “nice”, not rocking the boat, about being a bother or annoying, or about creating a contentious situation, your child may not get what they need. Be as loud as it takes, as often as you need to be and for as long as it takes. The squeaky wheel gets the oil. Don’t Wait and See. EVER. I fell hard for the “it’s so early” and “he’s too young” and “we don’t do that here” jargon. While it’s never too late to address deficits and learn new skills, earlier is ALWAYS better in terms of how long it will take and how much effort it will require for your child. Wait and see is code for “I want to pass this scenario down the line”, among other things. Do Write Everything Down AND Keep/Organize It One of my biggest regrets in discussing all of these concerns those first few years verbally and with my son’s teachers. I have zero proof that I ever expressed my concerns to anyone or that they didn’t do anything about those concerns. I’ve spent hours searching for report cards, test results, email correspondence and more. From day one of your gut being triggered, start a chronological log (use a Google doc for example) with entries by date, the most recent being at the top. At minimum, create a file folder in your email account and move all correspondence on this issue to that file. Any concern you want to express, any evaluation or support you want to request, put it in writing with the date and send it to both the teacher and appropriate administrator (email will suffice). Don’t Accept “We Don’t Do That Here” As An Answer If you are told, in response to a request, that “we don’t do that here”, ask them to show you the law in writing. For example, when I asked to record our IEP meeting (which is permissible by law in Pa) I was told I could not. When asked why, the Supervisor of Special Education replied “we don’t do that here.” When my advocate presented her with the law stating that I could she replied, “Well, yes, but we just usually don’t.” Ummm “We prefer not to” is not the same as “by law we do not have to or you are not permitted to.” Do Find (& Bring) Your People I fought SO hard for SO long and, toward the end, I meant business. I created slideshows with data to bring to the meetings. I wrote novels in advance of meetings. I researched signs and symptoms and correlated those with his data. And so on. I got absolutely nowhere until I nearly broke and brought in an advocate. It was then and only then that they truly started listening and put the wheels in motion. I often wonder how our journey would be different had I brought her on from the start or anywhere along the way. We are fortunate in our area to have many excellent private advocates, ones who offer a sliding scale and non-profits who may help advocate at no cost to your family. Even if you simply bring a friend or family member to the table as an extra pair of ears or to take notes, you will be better off. They may have seven people on their side of the in-person or virtual table. That can feel incredibly intimidating when you are the only one on yours. You weren’t meant to parent alone and this journey adds a whole new layer to needing a village. Your friends may never have been in your position of having a child with special needs or having to fight to get them what they need. Find and surround yourself with those who do. Speaking of needing a village, we’ve got you and, now, you’ve got us. Wherever you are on this journey, learn more about many ways and places, both virtually and in-person, you can connect with experts and parents “who get it” on our Find Your Community page and our Events calendar.
